6 Signs You and Your Therapist Might Not Be the Right Match

Starting therapy is a big step, and finding the right therapist can make all the difference. Sometimes, though, you might notice that things don’t quite click. That doesn’t mean therapy itself isn’t for you — it just might mean this particular therapist isn’t your person.

Here are some signs that you and your therapist may not be the right fit:

1. You Don’t Feel Heard or Understood

If you walk away from sessions feeling like your therapist isn’t really “getting it,” that’s a red flag. Feeling seen and understood is a huge part of the work.

2. You Don’t Feel Safe Being Honest

Therapy should feel like a space where you can say the real, unfiltered stuff. If you find yourself holding back because you’re worried about how your therapist will react, that’s worth paying attention to.

3. Their Style Doesn’t Match Your Needs

Some therapists are more structured, others are more conversational. Some give lots of feedback, others mostly listen. Neither is “wrong” — but if their style isn’t helping you, it’s okay to want something different.

4. They Dismiss or Minimize Your Experience

If you bring up something important and your therapist brushes it off, changes the subject, or makes you feel small for bringing it up — that’s not okay.

5. You’re Not Making Progress (and It Feels Stuck)

Therapy isn’t always linear, but over time you should feel something shifting — whether it’s more self-awareness, new coping tools, or just a sense of being supported. If it always feels stagnant, it might be the match.

6. You Leave Feeling Worse Every Time

Some sessions might feel heavy (that’s normal), but if you consistently leave feeling dismissed, shamed, or like you’ve done something wrong, that’s a mismatch.

✨ Here’s the most important part: It’s okay to switch therapists. Finding a good fit can take time, and advocating for what you need is part of the process.

Therapy should feel like a partnership. If it doesn’t, you’re allowed to say, “This isn’t working for me,” and look for someone who feels like the right fit. Ready to take the first step in your healing? Click here.